Let’s be real, when you hear “child counselling”, your first thought is probably, “what could a 2 year old possibly need counselling for? Are they upset about the Cheerios their brother stole from them at breakfast or are they torn up about the milk they spilled on their lap?” The idea of a small child venting on a therapist's couch, discussing their biggest life problems does sound ridiculous. But child counselling isn't about analyzing existential crises, it's about helping kids (and parents) survive the emotional roller coaster that is the terrible twos.
Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT) is a common form of treatment used to strengthen the bond between children and parents, while working on emotional regulation and behaviour skills. Therapy isn’t just about talking it out, especially when your vocabulary consists of “no” and “mine”. PCIT is a form of counselling that is all about creative, play based strategies. It consists of hands-on play, with puppets, puzzles and games in order for a child to express their “big emotions”. Through Child-Directed Interaction (CDI) and Parent-Directed interaction (PDI), parents learn how to foster a positive and nurturing relationship while ensuring effective discipline and behaviour management strategies with their child. Through these skills, toddlers learn how to express their emotions, handle frustration and begin building important social skills they’ll carry onto later stages of life.
During a child’s early years, their brain undergoes the most rapid development of their life. This period is a whirlwind of discovery, big feelings and often a lack of skills to regulate them. Toddlers are frequently misunderstood, resulting in the infamous label of the “terrible two’s”. It’s the stage where they test boundaries, push your buttons and throw tantrums that rival award winning performances. For parents, this can feel like a reflection on your own shortcomings. It causes parents to question their parenting and whether they have done wrong.But understanding the cognitive and emotional changes your child is going through can help replace guilt with empathy. This is where counselling can make a world of a difference.
PCIT is a form of therapy designed to improve the relationship between parents and their young children, while addressing challenging behaviours. Especially with kids who are prone to behaviour challenges, like ADHD, ODD or autism, assistance can become extremely beneficial. PCIT gives children tools to handle tricky emotions and transactions. It allows them to express feelings they don’t yet have words for, teaching them to cope in healthier ways. Just as importantly, it helps parents uncover their child’s unique temperament and triggers, fostering stronger relationships and reducing stress for the whole family.
We teach our kids physical skills like how to crawl, walk and eventually tie their shoes. Think of emotional development as the same, another essential skill for your child’s life. PCIT isn’t about “fixing your child”, they are not broken, but about setting them up for success, without the screaming matches over bedtime.
So what two year old needs counselling? Maybe the question should be, who wouldn’t benefit from a little guidance during this wild and wonderful stage of life? Instead of seeing PCIT as a result of failed parenting, see it as assistance to strengthen the relationship between your family as a whole.
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